we're not going to save the environment today.


"haven't you ever talked to one of those guys?" emily once asked me. "no," i said. she was talking about those people who stand outside qfc and solicit money, signatures, or whatever it is they're after. i never got sucked into talking to one of them. i had no idea what they were about, or what kind of work they did. like most people, i passed these canvassers (or whatever they're called) as though they were statues. most likely, they are working for a good cause, but since i don't support working at all, i never talk to them.

today, however, i wanted to talk to someone. i wanted to disappoint someone. i went in knowing i wasn't gonna sign anything, wasn't gonna sign up for some monthly membership. the girl wore a beanie and smiled. why are they always wearing beanies? why do these nonprofit save the world environmental agencies always hire young twenty-something hippies?

"what have you got there?" i asked. this threw her off. she was expecting me to just walk past and not even look at her. i was already off to a good start. "i've got some information about environmental washington." she handed me the binder. "i'm kristen, by the way." i looked up to see if she would shake my hand, but she didn't. i flipped through the pages, looking at the pictures, taking in no information at all. she kept talking about washington state and legislature and how our environmental is falling apart. is it, kristen? is it really? are things...bad?

i got to the very last page of the binder, and i saw the little square boxes with the dollar sign preceding them. she said something about a monthly contribution. i nodded. "can i look this up online?" i asked, stupidly. "yeah," she said, "environmentalwashington.org." "cool," i said. i handed the binder back to her and turned to leave. "we could really use your help today," she said. i knew exactly what she was on about. she needed x number of memberships today, tuesday, so she could collect x number of dollars from her employer. "i'll look it up online," i said. "i really gotta get back to work." her look of disappointment was priceless.

in the words of modest mouse, "sometimes i'm so full of shit that it should be a crime."

1 comment:

beastmomma said...

That is so mean!