it's destined for some people.


it was friday night, and lisa and i were walking towards the parking garage. i looked to the left and saw a group of undergrads hanging out outside bellarmine hall. "i used to hang out with assholes like that," i said. i was trying to be funny, but it just sounded sort of mean. "oh yeah?" lisa asked. "yeah," i said. i wanted to be funny. i wanted to be outgoing and out of control. i didn't want to be my boring self anymore.

lizzie rode past us on her bicycle. "is that a one speed?" i asked. "yeah," she said. "you're such a hipster," i said. she nodded. i asked her if i could try it. "it's too small for you," she said, but i got on anyway. it took me a couple of seconds to make it go, and then i realized the bike had no brakes. i went uphill to try and slow down, or else make it stop. two women were walking towards me, and i jumped off the bike, nearly crashing to the ground. they walked past me and said nothing.

i got to lisa's car, and i said, "is this you?" "yeah," she said, "this is my ride." i got in the front seat. we had just come back from seeing fast and furious, so i asked her if she felt like revving her engine, or racing through a mineshaft. "yeah," she said, "totally!" i told her she should try drifting. she made her car weave back and forth. "i guess that's not really drifting," she said. "no," i said, "it isn't." there was a song playing on the radio. it was called "crack the bottle" or something like that. "is this eminem?" i asked. "yeah!" she said. "have you not heard this song?" she asked me. "no," i said, "i haven't." she turned the radio up really loudly, and then she started dancing in her seat.

we went to the am/pm near the school. it looked like there were two drug deals simultaneously going down. "this is always like the most ghetto spot for some reason." "oh, there's a reason for it," she said. "can you believe this happens right next to the school?" "yeah," i said, "it's crazy." we went inside. she bought a redbull, and i bought a six pack of corona. "in the spirit of toretto," i said. "what?" she asked. "i don't know what that means." "fast and furious," i said. "come on."

she drove to lizzie's apartment, which was only about a block away from the school. it looked like there was another deal going down outside her apartment, but then again, it might have just been a guy asking for directions. lisa scornfully watched the interaction, then headed inside. there were two boys in the living room, and one was playing an acoustic guitar. lisa said hello, then headed upstairs. "are you coming?" she asked. i followed her upstairs.

lizzie's room was exactly how i imagined most hipster girls' rooms to be. she had a bunch of photographs, mini-posters, and postcards tacked to her walls. there was a small darjeeling limited poster and a bigger marilyn monroe poster. i tried to open one of my coronas. "do you have a bottle opener?" i asked. "it's not a twist-off?" lizzie asked. "no," i said. "no," lisa said, "they're not twist-offs." lizzie went downstairs to find me one. i told lisa i thought redbulls were disgusting. "they are," she said, "but i've gotten used to them."

lizzie came back with a bottle opener, and i cracked open a beer. lisa went downstairs to get three shotglasses. i asked lizzie if she liked the life aquatic. "it wasn't my favorite," she said, "but i still really liked it. i really loved the royal tennenbaums," she said. suddenly, i felt old and bored by it all. was i just going to keep going through life building friendships based on wes anderson films and indie rock bands? jesus, i hoped not. lisa started pouring shots. she asked me if i wanted one, but i said i was good with my beer. lisa chased her shot with her redbull. "that's fucking disgusting," i said, then added, "that is not a chaser." "it is a chaser," she said, proudly. "it's how i roll."

lizzie turned on her alarm clock radio. "daft punk," she said. lcd soundsystem's "daft punk is playing at my house" song came on. "i wish daft punk would play at my house," i said. lizzie told us this story about her friend who went to paris and bought tickets to a daft punk show off craigslist. "she got to the show, and somehow, she managed to fight her way to the front. then, at some point, she got on stage and ended up like, dancing with daft punk the whole night. she jumped off and started crowdsurfing." "cool," i said. lisa didn't sound like she was too impressed, either. "i just feel like," lizzie began, "that it's destined for some people to have amazing adventures like that happen to them. like, i feel like i'm the kind of person who could go years and nothing that cool would ever happen to me."

"where should be we go tonight?" lisa asked. they shot names back and forth. i felt lame for never having been to, or even having heard of any of the places they were naming. "barca?" "cha cha?" "ju ju?" "i have no idea what the fuck you guys are saying," i said. "sorry," lisa said, "all bars within about a mile and a half radius." "let's do barca," lizzie said. "barca?" lisa asked. "yeah, barca!" lizzie said. we got up. "i'll just leave this here," i said, pointing to the five unopened coronas. "i could put it in my bag and give it to you at the bar," lizzie said. "nah, that's okay," i said, "it's my present to you." "i'll bring them to work," she said. "yeah," i said, "we should drink in one of the interview rooms."

lisa drove us to barca, a little bar on capitol hill, across the street from value village. i went in the crowded bar and immediately felt out of place. most of the kids were well dressed white yuppies. lisa and lizzie ordered drinks and left their tabs open. i ordered a guinness and declined to keep my tab open. we sat at a high table in the back, and i asked lisa how she liked her blackberry. "it sucks," she said. "why's it so bad?" i asked. "i just don't like it," she said. i picked it up and took her picture with it. the flash was ultra bright. "it's so bright!" lizzie said. lisa took lizzie's picture and lizzie acted like she didn't want to have her picture taken.

"go hit on that big guy," i said. i wasn't being serious, but i was kind of being a dick. maybe i was tired of being the nice guy, or pretending to be the nice guy. maybe i was tired of getting nowhere with women and always having them around as friends. "no," lisa said, "you go hit on him." "i'll need another beer," i said. they laughed. i got up to use the restroom. there wasn't an empty stall or urinal, so i had to wait. when i got back to the table, the two girls were chatting with two guys at a nearby table. i sat there, drinking my beer, not quite knowing what to do with myself.

i overheard some of the conversation. "what did you do tonight?" one of the guys asked. "we saw fast and furious," lizzie said. "how was it?" "horrible," lisa said. "awesome," lizzie said. "i like how you said, 'horrible,' and she said, 'awesome,' at the same time," the guy said. at one point, lizzie finally turned and introduced me, as though i was really interested in meeting two guys at a bar. i said my name, and one of them shook my hand. they got back to their conversation. lizzie turned back to talk to me for a bit, but by then, i was ready to leave. "i think i'm gonna go after this beer," i said. she nodded. i finished it quickly and said goodbye. lisa gave me a half-hug, and one of the guys shook my hand again. "it was nice meeting you," he said. wish i could say the same, bub.

i went out into the cold street, wishing i had brought my jacket. i put my zune on shuffle and headed to the nearest bus stop.

1 comment:

Retarded said...

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