chemical diacetyl.


when ada was pregnant, a man knocked her over. the way she tells it, she was feeding a meter down near pioneer square, when suddenly, this man, who was in a rush, knocked her right over. "did he even stop?" i asked. "no," she said, "he didn't." everyone at the table gasped. she held up her fist and shook it. "i curse that man!" she said. the whole episode led to her having her son born three weeks prematurely. he's now entering his third year of law school at the uw.

my boss talked about her husband's annual family get-together. it takes place in west virginia. according to the women at the table, west virginia is a poor state. "it sends three or four times the national average of soldiers to iraq and afghanistan," ada said. someone brought up the coal mining accident that happened some years ago. "i remember seeing interviews with families when that happened. it was like they were living in a different country." "dirt poor," ada agreed. "they rely on coal mining, and butter-flavored popcorn. the men there inhale that artificial flavoring, the dust, and it damages their lungs. they develop the damage is irreversible, and their lungs can only work at 30% capacity."

according to the women, there's a spring in west virginia that produces "happy" water. the water contains small amounts of lithia, and people from all over the country visit that spring to get a drink, hoping it will cure ailments and diseases. "here's a sad story," my boss began. "i was at the airport in new york, and i had a whole bottle of that stuff, and airport security confiscated it. they wouldn't even let me drink it!" i told her that airport security usually lets me drink my water when i forget to empty my bottle. "i don't know," she said, "it might've been because it was in new york."

they talked about my boss' pregnancy. she is due in a matter of weeks, and the baby is breached. she tried acupuncture to get the baby to turn around, but it didn't work. ada said that when her boy was breached, an experienced doctor, someone who had dealt with breached babies for one hundred years, twisted her stomach and turned the little boy all the way around. "i heard it's painful," my boss said. "it didn't hurt when i did it," ada said. "the doctor did it in about two seconds, and i didn't feel a thing."

we got down to business. they were talking about social justice again. they said things like, "we need to reach the non-choir people," and "we need to expose the false dichotomy." i sat there, and i took notes, but mostly i ate the brownies with berries my boss had made, and i took in juicy grapes and cherries from the metropolitan market. their sushi was surprisingly good, too. ada talked about the metropolitan market, and how the founder took a huge risk, competing with the likes of safeway, pcc, trader joe's, and qfc. apparently, the founder decided he wanted to attract more male customers, so he placed cigars at the entrance and expanded the wine selection. i think the sushi alone did the trick.

1 comment:

beastmomma said...

Try not to take this the wrong way, but it seems like you are an easy man to win. Given that you love sushi so much :)